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Late Night Rumblings Shake Downtown Wichita - Leaves Massive Hole

River

The Hole From Which Godzilla Surfaced
Seen in the middle of the Arkansas River, Godzilla left quite a hole in his wake.

Late last night Wichita residents were awoken by what many believed to be an earthquake. It was not an earthquake.

Unbeknownst to many, Godzilla has actually been living deep underground, beneath the city of Wichita. Last night the creature surfaced. After his time in the spotlight for the most recent Godzilla movie released in 2014, he chose Kansas as a nice quiet area to retreat from the glitz and glamour of Hollywood. 

Godzilla attempted to visit Joyland, the once popular Wichita amusement park. The creature was quite upset upon finding out about the park's closure and could be seen sulking just north of the Keeper of the Plains before retreating back underground.

Sad Godzilla Seen Behind Keeper of the Plains

April Fools!

Please do not take this article seriously. Godzilla would obviously be much more informed and would have known Joyland closed in 2004, long before he chose to visit. 

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